Due to the Yom Kippur holiday, I endured a fast on Saturday. As you should know, the human body is not designed to go an entire day without food or water. If you ever want proof of this, try it. It generally isn’t a pleasant experience.
Here’s how my time went:
Friday 5:45 PM – I consume a dinner consisting of rotisserie chicken, a pasta side, and salad. I top it off with a Georgetown Cupcake and several glasses of water to avoid dehydration. I should really just eat a smaller meal. It’s not like eating a big meal really improves my condition. If anything, it just leaves me feeling worse at the start.
6:10 – Feeling bloated due to all the food, I take some Tums. This is always a good move.
8:00 – The Cutlet’s screams give me a headache, only I am unable to take anything to relieve it. I plead with the Cutlet to stop crying. This is met with limited success.
10:30 – Bedtime. Still feeling full from dinner and headache has subsided a bit, so all is well.
Saturday – 7:30 AM – Wake up. I don’t normally eat immediately after waking up, so I don’t feel especially hungry yet.
9:00 AM – I leave to go to Yom Kippur services and start to feel a slight rumbling in my stomach as if to say, “Hey, don’t we normally eat around now?”
12:00 PM – During services, the feeling of “I’m pretty hungry. It’ll be nice to get something to eat afterwards…oh wait,” sets in. It is not a pleasant revelation when you feel this hungry and realize it will still be awhile before you can eat.
12:45 PM – On the Metro heading home, I feel a bit lightheaded. I start to wonder if it would really be so bad if I ate something.
1:15 PM – As I get off the Metro, I feel very lightheaded, and have a headache.
1:30 PM – Upon returning home, I read the newspaper on the internet, but it is hard to concentrate too much. I find myself re-reading things a few times. I also find it is more difficult to keep my head still for some reason.
1:45 PM – As per my new annual tradition, I watch the “Satellite Down” episode of G.I.Joe. I watched this episode on Yom Kippur back when it was originally aired in 1985, so last year I decided I would watch it on Yom Kippur every year. I love traditions!
2:15 PM – Trying to conserve energy, I lie down to take a nap.
3:00 PM – After falling in and out of sleep, I get up and try talking to Mrs. Cutter. However, I have begun to get a little loopy and giddy and Mrs. Cutter tends to get a bit frightened when I get like this.
3:30 PM – I tell the Cutlet that maybe one day we can fast together, and it will be oh so much fun for the both of us! Mrs. Cutter is probably thinking that it is best that I don’t speak to the Cutlet anymore.
4:30 PM – I give the Cutlet her bottle. When she gets a bit fussy, I remind her that some of us don’t get to eat, so she appreciate the food she has been given. I’m not entirely sure the lesson has sunk in.
5:05 PM – We head out to Bugaboo Creek Steak House for dinner. At this point, the fast doesn’t really seem that bad. A realization sets in that “Yes, this is bad. But it is temporary and will soon be over.”
5:15 PM – I erroneously tell Mrs. Cutter that she needs to get off at the next exit. Mrs. Cutter is very glad that she decided to drive.
5:20 PM – Apparently, for Saturday night dinner at Bugaboo, they put all the children and seniors on one side of the restaurant. There was a small boy in the booth next to us who kept looking over the booth at the Cutlet. I told him that if he woke her, he would be responsible for getting her back to sleep.
5:35 PM – Salad arrives. After doing some final reflecting on the fast and saying a prayer, I begin to eat. Food, delicious food is once again introduced into my system.
5:50 PM – I consume my prime rib. I don’t know if it was because I was so hungry, but it tasted especially good tonight. The boy in the next booth comments that the Cutlet is beautiful. I begin to worry. I shouldn’t have to worry about boys hitting on her at such a young age.
6:30 PM – After returning home, I have another Georgetown Cupcake and use the facilities. You’ll find that eating a big meal, then fasting for a day, and then eating a steak can do strange things to the digestive system.
So overall, fasting for a day isn’t the worst thing that can happen. After all, some people in the world go hungry every day, and don’t have the option to break the fast with a large meal.
Random Thought of the Week
I realize that people of my generation worship Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert. But the massive Facebook orgasm that people had last week when they announced the Rally to Restore Sanity and March to Keep Fear Alive seemed a little much.
I mean, are these events going to be that spectacular? The way people (and I know many of you are reading this) reacted, it was like they announced that Jesus and Elvis were going to appear and help debut Kanye West’s new album.
Now that would be news I could get excited about!
Random Picture Found on the Web
This is a car pimped out to look like a hamburger. I guess this is to advertise the flea market’s bar and grill, as using a hamburger car to advertise a flea market is a little strange.
Commercial Analysis of the Week
Here’s an entry from Geico:
Mrs. Cutter loves this commerical. It is kind of funny. I can understand the pig’s happiness, as I too like to stick my head out the window of the car. I really enjoy having the wind in my face.
And doesn’t the announcer guy sound a lot like Robert Stack? His name is apparently Mike McGlone, but aside from various supporting roles, he hasn’t yet had a breakout role to earn him national celebrity. Wouldn’t it be a little funny if Geico turns out to be his big break?
Top Five of the Week
In honor of that happy little pig, I’ll do my Top Five Corporate Mascots.
5. Trix Rabbit – I always felt bad for the Trix Rabbit. Really, would it kill those kids to give him some of their cereal? Why are they so opposed to a rabbit eating Trix. I mean I’ve had Trix and it really isn’t anything special. Certainly nothing to base your existence around. Now if it was Waffle Crisp, I could see his obsession.
4. The Gecko – He’s charming and all, but I am still curious exactly how he started working for Geico. If you’ll recall, in his initial appearance, he very clearly did not work for Geico, and got upset when his identity was confused.
Now, is the Gecko actually working for Geico, and this is some sort of commercial-within-a-commercial? If so, it’s very meta.
But if you notice, the Gecko’s voice has changed. Did they see that having a gecko in their commercial could be a success and in response hired one with a similar voice? Interesting.
3. Coco the Monkey – Coco was the short lived mascot for Cocoa Krispies. He brought us this awesomely catchy theme song:
2. Kool-Aid Man – Sure, he causes a lot of destruction, but I think it would be really cool to have a giant pitcher of Kool-Aid burst through the wall. It might really break up the monotony of the work day.
I’m slightly confused why he doesn’t shatter when bursting through the wall. That must be some durable glass. Although honestly, that commercial probably deserves an analysis of its own.
1. Ronald McDonald – I remember watching Saturday morning cartoons one week as a kid when a McDonalds commercial came on. And to my utter disbelief, it was a new actor playing Ronald! I was amazed by this and alerted my mother, but she didn’t seem to think it was a big deal. Apparently she had seen her share of Ronald McDonalds come and go. But for me, this was the first time I had seen a change, and it was a bit of a shock to the system.